Feedback Strategies: Praise

The two articles that I read for this assignment were 5 Reasons to Stop Saying "Good Job!" and The Difference Between Praise and Feedback. Reading these two were hard for me. I did not quite understand why praise is so bad. I also had no idea how bad parents worry about what they say to their kid because when reading the articles they said parents were careful not to say certain things or would google scripts to say to their kid. This seems a bit crazy or overboard to me. They are your child and each person has a unique way of caring for their child. The second article specifically mentioned process praising which I also have never heard of. This is when you praise someone for the process not the actual work, such as "wow, that must of taken you a long time" instead of good job. The article gave another example about saying a child is good for taking out the trash. This seems a bit silly. I would thank my child for doing that because that is helpful. I did not like how in the first article, for one reason it said saying good job is manipulative. I think a parent would act in the best interest of their child and the child may not see it that way. For example, I did not want to learn how to swim or go swimming but my mom made me and praised me for my effort and work. I now love to swim and have swam on a swim team in middle and high school but this would not have happened if my mom did not make me or praise me.

After reading these two articles I think what it comes down to is love. As a parent, do you love your child and always want the best for them? I think too many times we say "good job" because it is easier than saying anything else. This is sad. This is not doing the best for the child. As a parent you should be investing into your child and getting to know them, who they are, how they think, etc. We need to stop staying at the surface and dig deep and find out what made them act this way or why they drew it like that? Simply ask questions and actually form a relationship with your child. The one thing this article got right is "good job" should not be an instinct response. It is good to praise but it is also good to give feedback and learn about the person.

(Feedback Cat. Cheezburger)